Beyond the wall
sunlit slids
on the floorboard
wind whistles
no, it moan
big trucks down diversion road on the way to somewhere
and birds gliding above it
those white in colours and grey sky
holding empty glass
of rum
waiting of dusk
waiting of dawn
cornfields has naked scarecrow dancing
another series of circus event
probably drunk for the next few hours
The world is tired
and
people
were messed up
everyday,
as we woke up
we saw,
men were killed
over broadlight
arresting them
and later on,
breaking them
sometimes, I ask myself
why
the wind
are blowing
this way
there these people that butchers, and
they were all over
always, there’s nothing we can do
just biting our lips
but as you see, we also have our soul, flickers
smoldering, but roaring
surging
like fires at deeper dark nights
~ ( to G. Floyd )
my
skin were
like a morning
rays,
that rose
from the sky,
almond–
shape eye,
dark as a dusk,
round ,
shape face
roaring dazzling lips,
grandma talked often
best she could –
don’t forget the
past, where
we –
sailed across the
orient sea –
waves
along seagulls,
the boat
and
our fading heritage,
make it
alive –
where we came,
where we goin.
i sat at the corner
i didn’t care—
the whole class were thrilled
the professor or rather a doctor
stood in front holding her lousy book
with her lousy clothes
with her lousy hair
lousy smile and of course a
lousy make up
i remembered a middle age
woman
hosted a Tupperware party
in my aunt’s house
“what are you doing?” she said.
i was surprised. She used to have a lousy shrill
too. ” Mr Bruce , may I have your attention for one
hour or else you will be standing here in front for the whole semester.”
I sat straight and looked at her. She already grinning. “Where is your module?”
she got me there. I thought. Why would I bring that lousy module she authored. It look like she teach a grade schooler with the yellow cover book for kids.
“I forgot Ms L.”, of course her name doesn’t start for L and of course I wouldn’t tell her it stand for a million lousy of her.
“you had half a dozen of books on your desk and you hadn’t take mine with you.”
Keats
Dickinson
Crane
Twain
chrichton
Ludlum
” Foundation of Education. How much?” I said
and look already sideway toward the window.
” What did you say?”. She walked toward me.
Her cheek were red along with her eyes.
“How much?”
her face changed quickly to a friendly manner
” lets talk business after class.”
The whole class attention drifted sleepily as she talked for another 45 minutes. My mind was outside
somewhere at the
woodland
ocean
river
somewhere far
and the foundation of education module
I know she copy-paste at uncle google
and put her name BIG at it and bragged, “i authored
lots of school book on this campus. And I’m a doctor.”
my fellow classmates i know and
classmates i only know with their faces
with their mannerisms
with their yawn
and grunts
whom i walked alongside in the corridor
sat in the cafeteria
and did not bothering to say hi
hardly held the book at their hand
to avoid a crease
that’s the last time i seen the lousy professor
dropped my subject under her
soon she said dismiss.
i walked out without looking at her face
what a shame
i wont forget those lousy day
a
freshman in college
an aspiring deanslist for the next semester
got a failing grade from a lousy mentor
she passed a failing grade at the registrar big time
intent and in broadway
a stain on my curriculum vitae
okay
i decided to decorate it with lots of fail grades
drops
incomplete
etceteras
&
etceteras
college is much better
but i had to deal lots of people like her
people talk like her
people walk like her
people you taught
i think
i’ve seen Hitler
a Hitler
who took everything
anything
even a penny on your trouser
even a candy bar on your shirt pocket
even your passion and even your dream
people who butcher
people who can kill in an instant
not physical but in one way or another
it took me ten years to finish college
it took me ten lonely years
but had no regret
read the book than listen to lies
one step at a time
you see
how strong you face the monster
the world had created
perhaps
right at this moment
right at the chair
where i sat not long ago
perhaps
another skeptic,
like me would say
“what the craft…. Is this
an insurance policy seminar?”
We are on the upper deck
of the boat
traveling the black water
of Celebes
we talked about the latest rock band
Have you heard their songs?
O asked
Yes, I answered
observing the stars
solemnly
never seen this near before
It is Eraserhead, damn it’s cool
Yeah but I like Yano, I said
They wore black t-shirt,
and red Robertson shu
I like your shu, it’s reeed,
O said excitedly
Yeah, but I prefer blue,
I answered
How much is your shu?
I just don’t know,
I said
It’s red man. It’s red
We opened tanduay rum
Check this out K.
I don’t drink O.
Yo with red Robertson shu, Yo wore
black shirt,
a puma with a fierce blue eyes,
imprinted on it
ripped jeans
and you dunt drink
I reached the glass and took a shot
shit
It burns, I coughed
and we laughed
under the gleaming
trillion stars
Check this out K.
I don’t smoke O.
what the heck, yo had hairdo of the hippie
and yo dunt smoke
it is the 90s and Eraserhead sung
Huling El Bimbo, the last El Bimbo
in MTV Asia. Look like they got best alternative of the year. Said some kind of award
shit
it burrs
K, we have grass,
D took it on the park. Elmer stick. Have you seen him K.?
Never seen a stick man before
Then we laughed again
harder
red cigarette, drinking rum in the sea
not do the grass, damn that grass
then I looked at the black sky
touching it, I am still lonely
c’mon little bro, sing with me
O. had a guitar on his hand
we sung O Pare Ko ( hey brother)
Hey, K,
I heard yo do college.
O. asked,
lighted a cigarette
I do English course O.
OK noticed yo always reading
something K, why
I don’t know —
I thrown my gazed over the horizon
the cold wind
drifting over
The night is growing
deeper
and the boat slipping
into darkness
I grab my thick jacket and place
it on my bed
anytime soon, you’ll experience your first winter
I mean, dry winter
Fernando said. The eagle on our group
of Filipino contract worker
in Saudi desert
sometimes, this storm took days
and when it done
cold crawl deep in your bone
your nose and ear will bleed
we stayed inside the cabin watching
BBC
lights switch off
in the middle of the day
with our bonnet on our head
I went outside to see what it looks like
my mouth open in amazement
hair dance wildly
sandstorm is—
an army of legions drifted slowly
in the
battlefield
sands against sands
gods against gods
Indian ocean breathing
and die
rolling endless
on the shore
monsoon
came
flooding
this early
their alleys
their temple
their gods
and goddesses
mostly, their Rama
shirtless kids
running
men sitting
beedi roll
on their lips
black birds
cawing
never sing
hundreds
thousands
hovers mid air
darkening
on grey ash
blackness
everything
making it felt lonely
and cold
Colombo is humble
quite
and I look at it
for the last time
from
airport bus
it rain again as our
plane has
lost in the cloud
The wind had knocked the bell in the citadel
Blows cold and bird flutters, looking for haven
Dry leaves started to fell,
waltzes
The soil awaits, observing the sky
Cornfield bows, its tendril kisses
the hibernating moss in the ground
The rain came and almost everything
Had exclaimed, O it rain
Sometimes at late night, it knocked soft on our roof
As if a raven poke its beak on our window pane
We smiled and rolled to other side
The rain came and we wore our
Thick clothes,
from our closet,
a mug of freshly brewed coffee,
when it would be over, hope it won’t stop, and let it pour
Take the half finish novel
on the table, read as it beat
and hooves
and we just nothing to say
and listen
how we were so silent
Letting the rain to sneak around.
on a long hot
summer of the 90’s
facing the sea over Pacific
underneath the big ancient
canopy, stretch twigs to a
deathly pale finger
a kingfisher
spread its wing
down the burnt
exposed dead coral
the rumbling of the far crest of
white foamy gust
shutters, shooting upward
I am there sitting silently
in a protruding land pile
alone
all alone
wishing I had a cup of tea
on my palm while I enjoyed
the serene song of gail wind of May
that rhyme with the kettle
snoozing at the cold kitchen
but whoever he can stop the clock from ticking
nor hush the raven that visit
unexpectedly at night
life crawl even if you want
to stay a quite while
light were eyes bathe
from that youth filled dream
turned to
ashen memories
of cerebral macabre
like a rusty can that roll and roll
at the lips of the sea
not long ago
till now
like Trojan war
echoing immortality
the bird marred the carcass
of the skeleton
oozed on mud mimicry
the banshee shriek
screeching on the dark wood
skeetering like mouse
that lost in the hole
beside the unclosed old diary
now tell me
life is always all alone
I’m sure of it
you came in this world
and gone in the grave
all alone
a soft creaked
the door hinge ajar
the silhouette of a curious
man sat there
forever
envying the final
sigh of Van Gogh
hugging the one shot blast
that shocks the world
in awe
……
Twin tower fire blazing in the cloud
as if a great punched had dented it
and the black smoke
unfurling, sail sidelong
over the disturbed sky
~
a Boeing had struck the glass wall
unmerciful
hijacker whom may flirted with the stewardess and
oogled on their long legs and behind
where she had to attend them politely
and muttered asshole,
on her way back to crew cubicle
~
I was pinned on my chair,
eyes grew big
whimpering, NOooooo..
banging the keyboard
pleading as
It raged down
along with a thousand confused soul
buried on rubbles and ruins
asking
why in the world, they were there;
supposed,
they were in their backyard
cutting some dead twigs of lemon tree, having vegetable salad
with parsley, cucumber and sirloin
steak, ice bucket beer
yellow fin sashimi
beside gelatinous green wasabi,
might had been caught by a
drunk fisherman wore straw hat
under the heat of noon tide
in the Pacific
whistling Debussy
all the way from the Southeast
in the third world,
~
supposed, a young man had hangover drinking liquor at the bar
chit chatting with friend from college
aiming for promotion and trying
to reach his dream, an
American dream. Not knowing, on that early of
September 11, known widely as
9/11 attacked would be his end
Supposed, a business tycoon who still undecided to drain his offshore
accounts
in different places in Gibraltar
Caribbean or Cape cod
looking forward for tequila,
relaxing on white sand
beaches in Bali or Boracay, perhaps
that somehow had a child
onboard
thinking his cat, that
may be sleeping soundly
on the couch
Who knows,
there is a lot of possibilities that they wouldn’t be there, and
yet they had to be there
and taking their part on greatest horror
of terror
in the history of the free world
Only just a moment, an iconic landmark,
a tower that magnanimous
standing
tall for democracy and freedom
deleted
as if it wasn’t there
only the blue sky and the bustling
wind moaning
somewhere in the far ocean.
